Old friends – a brief musing

I’m sure I’ve covered some of this before, but with the upcoming house move I’ve been thinking a lot about friendship, parting, and what keeps a friendship going over long absences…

A mention earlier on twitter of a colleague reunion, reminded me of a dear university friend who’s recently got in touch, and who is moving to Bristol later on this year.

We were good friends (although nothing else) all through university, and whilst we’ve kept in touch on and off, I’ve only seen him once in the last 10 years or so.  As with so many good friends, despite the long absence, as soon as we saw each other, it really was as though we were simply getting together again after a week or so apart – a little news to catch up on (albeit in this case a marriage, and several house and job moves between us), but otherwise just slipping back into the familiar patterns of conversation, especially a genuine interest in each other’s views and ideas about anything and everything.

Gosh it was lovely to see him again.

But maybe there were a few differences…

At university there was always a slight frisson to the relationship because I very much wanted to “just be friends” and he hinted every so often that he wanted a little more than that. I hope ghe realised how much I valued that friendship and why I was so scared of risking it. We were also new to adulthood, not even starting to get established in our lives, and wondering where the world would take us.

20 years on, we’ve both found ourselves, and found our way in life to where we are today.  So whilst the intellectual interest in each other’s thoughts and feelings is still there, there’s a little more. We’re both much more comfortable flirting with each other, and the conversation strayed into unfamiliar, more intimate territory a few times.  But we’re old friends, so it’s all perfectly innocent, of course…

And maybe my memory fails me a little, but although his appearance hasn’t changed a great deal, he has filled out in an extremely pleasing fashion (i do have a bit of a thing about nice shoulders), and seems to be one of those men who really grow into their looks.

I’m hoping to see him again in a couple of weeks, and I just can’t wait. And I can’t help wondering where the conversation will take us next time….if it takes us anywhere interesting, I’ll be sure to let you know 🙂

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8 thoughts on “Old friends – a brief musing

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